Captain Thonash Linruki
by MyColorlessRainbowVeins
Summary: Warning; not Fluff... Not like my other stories. Because my friend helped write it. Thorki. Thor with Loki tied to a chair. This is Happening. I am ashamed. Picture will come later. M to be safe; nothing really all that bad... Just implied. Will be uploaded every now and then. May Loki watch you in your sleep. The Avengers have Problems.
1. Thor has Problems

"pillows rules." Said Loki.

"Oh yes", replied Thor.

"I love pillows". Loki said.

"Great for Pillow Talk, yes, /Brother/?"

"Do you not think it's a bit... Weird... To call each other... Brothers? "

"I kind of like it. Weird can be good. "Said Clint, eyes glowing blue, in his corner.

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?! HOW DID YOU GET IN?!" Loki yelled, hiding under the covers.

"I invited him." Said Natasha, or rather, Black Widow. Black form fitting catsuit shining in the dim light.

"BUT WHY?!" Loki slowly lowered the covers so he could look at her. "And who let you in? Thor! Did you let her in? Ugh, you're so WEIRD sometimes!" Loki slapped Thors' arm.

"/I/ am weird? Brother, your the one that invited /Odin and Frigga/ last time. Surely, the son of Hawk and the Daughter of the Spider. At least these people are /young/."

Loki rolled his eyes. "I invited then for DINNER Thor. DINNER. Not... To watch us sleep! It's completely different!"

Thor blinked confusedly, staring at his brother. "I... Don't see any difference, brother. They did spend the night, after all."

"In a different room, Thor. Ugh, you are so stupid." He stood, taking all of the blankets with him. "I hate you Thor!" He threw a pillow at him. "You weird, sick, stupid..." Loki ran out of things to call him. "I'm sleeping on the couch. Good night, /Brother/."

"Loki! No, wait!" Thor yelled, as Loki marched past.

"Maaayybeee... Me and Natash should go? This seems, a bit... Hawkward." Clint said, already having grabbed Natasha's hand, and marched out.

Thor blew this off, then ran out to one of their Fifteen living rooms, to find Loki. "I demand you come back to bed, now!"

"No. I hate you, remember?" Loki glared at him. "And... How did you know which room I was in? Never mind. I don't care. Get out." He threw another pillow at him. When Thor did not move, he began throwing other objects at him. A picture, a glass, the coffee table... Everything he could pick up.

Thor held back a laugh, as the pillow tickled his side. Once he flicked off the little wooden splinters from the table, he headed over to Loki. "Brother, did you really think that would work? Against me?" Thor asked, cockily. "You don't hate me, anyway. You'll have forgiven me by the end of Tonight. I'm sure of it." Thor told him, smirking, and pulling out a wooden chair from the corner of the room. "Absolutely sure of it." He said, an evil glint in his eye.

"Thor... No. No, don't you dare." Loki said backing away. "I don't know what you think you're doing but don't."

"You think those Puny threats could stop me? The worst you could do; Tickled me." He said, pulling out a rope.

"Where did you get a rope?!" Loki cried. "What is WRONG with you?!"

Thor laughed, not telling Loks where the rope came from. That was for him to know, and Loki never to find out. Thor pulled Loki over to the chair, before tightly tying the rope around Loki's wrists, behind him. "I'd like to see you get out of THIS.."

Loki struggled to get away from Thor, but it was no use. "Remind me how this is going to make me forgive you?"

"Trust me; I'm a Doctor." Thor told Loki gently, referring to the Doctor he previously met, that looked almost exactly like the dark elf he once faced. Thor walked around to the front of Loki, and kneeled down to his height. He could sense the vibe Loki was sending to him, and it wasn't pleasant. Loki thought Thor had gone insane; that much was clear. Well.. He'd have to show him. He smiled brightly in Loki's face, still a bit to tall.

Loki sighed. "You are not a doctor, but you do need one. Now, if you'll just untie me we can talk about this like adults." He rolled his eyes. "Lol."

Thor got a bit angry at that last comment, and glared into Loki's eyes. "No." He growled, slapping Loki across the face. He still gripped Loki's face, but harder. Only enough to cause a little pain. "This is my time. It's always... ALWAYS about you. Your adopted, okay. So are a lot of other people. You want to rule over Midgard? That's about to cross the line. You have all the Fangirls? Oh, heck no. I'm going to get some star time of my own, and you can't stop me." He said, his eyes boring into Loki's, before pressing his lips hard against the Green-eyed god's. Maybe next time... He should ask Jane to come over?


	2. Clintasha

Clint sighed dreamily. "Don't you just love watching?"

Natasha smiled Mischievously, "How could I not? The warm, curling bodies tangling themselves around each other, the un-even breathing, so rough you sound like you may hyperventilate, or... like you have already done so... Sometimes even small... Whimpers."

Clint nodded in agreement, "It's so... I dunno... Magical."

Black Widow rolled her eyes, "There's nothing Magical about it, Clint, baby. It's just some damn beautiful human instinct."

"But... it is, ya know?" Clint looked at her. "It's Magical..." He paused. "You... do believe in Magic, don't you?"

Natasha wrapped her arm around her Partner in Crime. He was acting like a Little Boy. It was almost Endearing. Perhaps he shouldn't have 'eaten' that 'Cheeseburger'..."Of course I do, Agent. But I wouldn't ever kill an innocent puppy on purpose... There have been a few slip ups here and there, but never meaning to. And, it's not Magical. It's /Hot/, but it's not Magical."

Clint looked like he was going to cry. He felt like he was going to cry. "It is too!" He yelled. "It is magic, and you know it!"

"Hey, buddy, when did the wrapper say you'd digest the burger?" Natasha said in a calming voice, like a mother would sweet talk her children into shutting up.

Clint blinked at her. "What? Talk about beside the point. I don't wanna talk about this any more. Puppy murderer." He crossed his arms and went back to watching.

Natasha turned back as well. Though she wasn't about to give up that easily. And, Five minutes later, the man got up, and disappeared. Coming back with a couple pieces of half eaten pizza.

"I want Pizza."

Clint leaned close to Natasha's ear. "Do you think he noticed us?" He whispered. Except it wasn't so much a whisper as a quiet yell.

"I don't know if he did before, but he probably noticed us now!" She yell-whispered back. This was her entertainment of the night, and it seemed like Clint was about to ruin that.

"We should hide!" She said, jumping behind a bush, and pulling Clint with her.

"No." Clint said standing up. "No, Natasha. I want pizza too." He began marching towards the house.

"Clint! No!" She whisper yelled once again, reaching an arm out faintly, knowing that she wouldn't be able to touch him when he was at least a foot away. "Anything but Pizza. Phil and Nick will get us in so much trouble if they know what we are doing."

Clint smiled, an odd, slightly evil glint in his eyes. "No. Phil won't. Phil knows."

Natasha felt her heartbreak. "Fine go get yourself killed. See if I care. It's YOUR fault he would ever know. Bless his poor Fanboyish heart..." She said, standing up, and walking away. Before taking her fourth step, she turned back. "I'm going back to watch some Thorki."

"What?" Clint narrowed his eyes at her. "What are you talking about? Killed? And why wouldn't Phil know I like pizza? Everyone likes pizza. Now, I think I saw a pizza place on the way here... Maybe we can stop on the way to Thorki?"

"Yes, killed. Fury's not one for easy punishm-" Natasha's face fell from shock. Pizza? "Punishm... Punishmmmm..." She stared up at Clint. He was pretty high right now. Maybe he wouldn't notice? "Punishmeronis. He'll totally 'kill' us, when he finds out we didn't get him any Punishmeroni Pizza."

"Then..." Clint said. "We'll just have to get him some... Wait... What's a... Punishmeroni?"

Natasha sighed, when she realized she wasn't getting away with it. "Oh, you know. Punishmeronis... The... Things... They are Blue, shaped like a Pepperoni, and they taste like Olives mixed with Jelly Beans."

Clint nodded. "Oh, yeah... I know what they are... They're my favorite." He smiled. "So... Pizza? And then some Thorki?"

Natasha smiled in return. "Pizza. Then some Thorki. Then, maybe... Some Clintasha?"

"Sounds like a date." Clint giggled. "Wait. Clintasha... Who's that?"


	3. The Problem of Llamas

Clint smiled, weeks after the Clintasha experience... Which... Went weirdly. And they haven't spoken about it since. He never thought Natasha was into Roleplaying. And ruling over him, he might add.. It reminded him of that time when Loki had him under control. Clint was reminded of the memory with a charming smile.

"Will you STOP pacing?!" Loki growled at Clint irritably.

Clint turned to look at him, blue eyes blaring, but not stopping his speed. "No. I was choked, and hit, and maimed, by a Llama. I will not stop Pacing. I feel like hell." He muttered the last part under his breath.

"And pacing helps?" Loki asked. "If you feel THAT bad, shouldn't you be in bed?"

Clint stopped pacing, and turned to Loki. "I don't think that would be the right thing to do. My butt hurts if I do anything worse then squatting. Did you know that thing had that much strength? It's unexpected, but then you start trusting it, and... BAM!" He started pacing again.

Loki tried not to laugh, and looked away from Clint so he wouldn't see his face. "Your... Butt hurts? I'm sorry, I think I missed part of this story..."

Clint blinked, looking over at Loki, before it dawned on him. "Oh! No! Not what happened! It just... Pushed me... Multiple times. On my butt. It hurts. Have any asspirin?" He punned.

Loki snorted. "I mean, I'm not judging. After all, you did hear about the horse... Incident... Didn't you? I honestly don't see the appeal myself, but hey, we're all into different stuff..."

"No! That didn't happen! You, can go, be your bad horsey self with the other little horses, but I'm strictly Human.. Same species, same body parts kind of person. I'd prefer not to morph everything... Seems... Painful."

"Same body parts?" Loki said slyly, trying very hard not to laugh. "So... You like men?" He held up a hand before Clint could answer. "You know... I could make the pain... Go away."

Clint stopped dead in his tracks, turning to look at Loki slowly, "Please... Just, don't." He gave a disgusted face. "I said HUMAN. I highly doubt anybody thinks that's what you are."

Loki was now having a very difficult time keeping a straight face. "But you know... You ARE under my control... And, if anyone asks... Just tell them you didn't know what you were doing." He got up and walked over to Clint, putting a hand on his face.

"Literally." He muttered, at the 'WHAT you are doing' part. He looked at the hand on his face, really hoping Loki washes his hands. "I... You're a god. Can't... Heh.. Um... /Ruin/ that title, by affiliating yourself with.. A simple Archer, who doesn't even know proper Archery Form." He said, desperately trying to come up with a good excuse to make Loki STOP being... Well... Loki.

Loki leaned very close to Clints face. "What are you talking about?" He asked.

Clint's eyes widened. "I... Get...Away...From my face."

Loki smiled. "No. What are you talking about?"

Clint shook his head. "No. Get away. ... ... ... Please?"

Loki raised his eyebrows, getting slightly closer to Clint. "Oh... You think... No." He laughed at the terrified mans face. "I use magic, remember? I could snap my fingers and you'd be fine. What did you think I was talking about, /Clint/?"

"That really doesn't explain... Why you are... So close to my face... It's creepy."

Loki smiled an unusually sweet smile, then licked the side of Clints face. "Because it scares you."


	4. A Brony Bromance

Tony stood outside the Lab, watching Bruce mess with a Hologram, trying to figure something out. This was happening often, it seemed. He liked watching Bruce. It was a past time. He'd developed feelings he was uncertain of, and he wouldn't tell anybody about them. He would just... Stalk. Pepper didn't expect him home for another two hours. And he had nothing to do.

He walked into the room, pinching Bruce on his side as he passed by. It's become a.. Habit, of his. It never works. He's only ever seen the Hulk in a fight. Oh, Hulk. Hulk was beautiful. Maybe he shouldn't hide his feelings?

That was when he got an idea.

Bruce sighed as Tony pinched him for what felt like the millionth time that day. It didn't _bother_ him per-say, but it did distract him. He had been working on the same thing all day, but whenever he thought he fially had it figured out, Tony would pinch him and he would forget what he was doing. "Why do you keep doing that?" He asked, without looking at Tony.

"Because it's funny." Tony said, sounding unsure. He really didn't know why. "It's a habit." He informed Bruce, sitting in a chair, figuring out his plan.

Bruce narrowed his eyes at the other man. He had a horrible feeling about the way Tony was looking at him. He laughed nervously. "That's a weird habit to have."

Tony shrugged, "You started it. Being the Hulk, and all. I pinch. You should know this by now..." He said, before a bright smile appeared on his face.  
"Bruce, in... Thirty minutes, would you please come to my office? I have something I want to show you."

Bruce rolled his eyes. "Fine. But... What is it you want to show me?"

"That, good sir, is a surprise. That I have yet to figure out." Tony smiled jokingly at him. "Just be there." He said, in an almost warning type way. "It's going to be awesome."

30 minutes later, Bruce found himself standing outsite Tony's office door. He raised his hand to knock, then lowered it again. What did Tony want? What was he going to do? He was constantly trying to make Bruce mad so he could see... The _other_ guy. He had a feeling that walking into that room would be a death sentence. For Tony. He didn't really want Tony to die. In fact, that would make him rather sad. "Idiot..." He muttered under his breath and decided to walk away from the office. If Tony asked, he'd just tell him he forgot, or time got away from him.

Tony waited impatiently inside of his office for Bruce to come in for Three minutes, before grabbing his prop, and leaving the room. This was going to happen. Now. Oh shit. Why was this happening. If he didn't do it now, he felt he never would.

Tony, Iron Man, was honestly /scared/ at this very moment.

Bruce was trying to leave without looking like he was trying to leave, which was no easy task. Various employees were all running around doing what ever it was they did, and every once in a while, one would stop him to say "Hey, Tony's looking for you ya know" and he would reply "Thanks, I'll go find him" and then hope they wouldn't tell Tony they had seen him.

Tony sighed impatiently, marching through the building. "Where is he?" He asked, to no one in particular, but he did get a response.  
"Who? Bruce?" A man in his late thirties asked, "He's... pathetically trying to escape. I don't know what he's trying to escape, or why, but he looks like he's having a hard time." He said, before walking away.  
Tony rolled his eyes. What was Bruce doing now? Tony sped his pace towards the front door, figuring he'd spot Bruce on the way. It was getting more and more difficult to not just turn and run away. He absent mindedly thought about Pepper. What would she say? What would she do? If he were just to walk up to her and say, 'Guess what! I'm gay!' Things would most likely not end up well.

When Bruce saw Tony, he tried not to scream. As it was, he let out a high-pitched, terrified squeel. The look on Tony's face was... Odd. "BUT I DON'T WANT YOU TO DIE!" Bruce half-yelled without thinking.

Tony stopped dead in his tracks, and stared at Bruce for a minute. He placed the CD player on the ground. "I'm Iron Man. I've faced Hulk before. I won't die, Bruce. I'm /_Iron Man/_. I have to do this. I can't let you go, without hearing it."

Bruce stared in shock at Tony. "But... But..." But he didn't have the words.

Tony kneeled down, and pressed a button on the CD player. The pop-y music known as "What makes you beautiful" played. "Bruce, for a while now, this has been on my mind. I've only now figured out the words to tell you what I want to say. But it's not really WORDS, per say, more.. Lyrics." He took a deep breath, and started singing.

" apps/forums/topics/show/11471031-a-brony-bromance-song "

Bruce blinked as the song came to an end. He realized he was crying, just a bit. What was Tony trying to tell him? He felt... He didn't even know. He had felt... odd feeling for his friend in the past, but he had never dreamed that Tony would feel the same way. He felt all warm and fuzzy inside, and suddenly he began to laugh. But when he saw Tony's heart-brocken face, he stopped. "Oh Tony..." He said, walking forward and taking his hands. "That was so sweet! Though, if you were trying to make me mad, I'm afraid you've failed." He touched Tony's cheek gently.


End file.
